Is it a new perspective?

I chose Chinese New Year to come back to this boring town for a arguably good reason. And, now I have to get ready to go back to Shenzhen to fight for my boring life. I am exhausted, and by admitting that I am admitting I am a bloody looser. Compared to millions of unfortunates in this world, I am a bloody unappreciative bastard. I am 36 years old, and now I am looking for a new perspective in my life - either I change my profession again or living in this misery. I have 2013 to figure it out and I need to act quick, real quick. I always feel like time is running out, for a very good reason. God bless!